Sunday, 30 October 2011

Desperately Seeking Supervision

Distance Traveled:   12,600 kms (BNE-MEL-SYD-BKK-PKT-BKK-CNX)
Flags Collected:   0
Time Difference: -3 hours (from Brisbane)
Soundtrack:  Some of Howard Shore's compositions from the LOTR soundtrack, along with Smashing Pumpkins, are helping me to envisage a celestial war. Odd combo, but it works
Currently Inspired by:   "You can't reach for anything new if your hands are full of yesterday's junk"
Stacks:   Just waiting for the big one.  It's been too long and the roads are way too uneven here.  Tripped on a step in a toilet, but again, no bruises.  Getting nervous.
Words written:   3,105 (at least it's going up, albeit slowly)


Ahh, brains are wonderful, contrary things, aren't they?  Not only am I struggling with a lack of desire to write my book, I have also put off writing this blog - even making a start on it - so many times that I think now I will have forgotten just about everything I have done (and it's a lot!)  We shall see...

I shall start with Monday, and the Tiger Kingdom.  It pretty much is what it sounds like, although anywhere there are fully grown tigers and no people with guns could probably realistically be considered to be their "kingdom".  The keepers not only didn't have guns, they didn't have tranquilisers, electric prods or any other type of nasty device with which to keep the beasts in line. In fact, all they had were these 20cm wooden sticks that they used to tap on the ground and gently tap the tigers with to get them to move, which is awesome in theory, until you're walking into a cage all tasty and human-smelling with three fully grown man-eaters and a couple of guys armed with twigs.  Nerve wracking, you say?  Maybe a little ;)  They were just gorgeous though, and the first two particularly were quite friendly.  The last kitty kept roaring and actually moved away from us, and the keepers made me chase him and go up to pat so I could get all three of them, despite my insistence that I was perfectly happy with the two I had already pet, thank you very much, and would much rather escape with both arms still attached to my torso.  However, we approached the third and petted without incident, and you'll be happy to know that everything that is supposed to be attached to my torso still is, and I don't have anything extra growing on there either, for anyone who wanted just that little extra peace of mind.  The teenage cubs and baby cubs were terminally adorable.  For photos of my visit to the Tiger Kingdom, click here.  I also took two videos.  For the one with the adults playing and looking far too awake and active about fifteen minutes before I went in, click here. To hear me talking in an embarrassingly babytalkish way to the teenage cubs, click here.  (NB. My driver, when asked how many people the tigers have seriously hurt or attacked since the park has been open, blithely replied "Not many, not many! Maybe 100, 200".  In addition we had to sign an indemnity document for death or maiming.  So my fears were not unfounded.)  On the way back, and to my sincere regret, we stopped at the Monkey School, where dozens of monkeys are kept chained to stumps at a length of about 30cm where they just run around and around and around in circles and chirp, until they are removed in tiny cages and brought to the "arena" where they are yanked forcefully around on leads and forced to perform all kind of demeaning acts for the laughing audience.  I hated every second of it.  If I was *that* kind of activist, I would break in there at night and release all of them.  Not happy.

Tuesday night I went to the Kantoke Palace Dinner and Show.  It's really the first time I've felt weird about being somewhere on my own.  It was clearly a place for large tourist groups.  Basically there were about three massive groups of more than thirty people each, a couple alone at a table for ten, and then me alone at a table for ten.  The food they served me was clearly supposed to be for at least six, also, I'd say.  See below:











Those of you who agree with my stance on food wastage (= bad) will be pleased to know that I made an extremely valiant effort at attacking the above.  However, there is only so much one can eat, and I eventually slumped, ill and defeated, over a good 3/4 of it unfortunately.  The show itself was terrific.  Lots of really young and talented Thai guys and girls doing lots and lots of different traditional performances.  Photos of Kantoke can be viewed here.  In addition, I took two videos.  One of a very interesting male performance with percussion and dancing HERE, and one of a female performance where they danced with parasols, which I found particularly engaging.  Click here to see that one.  Thai people are so gorgeous!  I have no idea how they bend their hands back like that though... I tried and ended up hurting myself, of course :P

Wednesday and Thursday I was not very well :-/  Am fine now though!

Friday belonged to the Golden Triangle.  A loooong day.  We were gone for 14.5 hours, and 8 of those were taken up with driving.  Lest this blog end up taking that long to read, I shall be concise.  We stopped at a hot spring in Chiang Rai, then the White Temple which really has to be seen to be believed.  My photos don't do it justice, but you can see them in the same album as the Kantoke stuff, if you haven't already looked at it.  Breathtaking.  Following that we headed up to the Mekong River where we caught a dirty and rickety-looking (but probably quite safe) boat over to Laos, where we were kindly offered a welcome drink of rice whiskey with dead animals floating in it.  Not kidding... there were a bunch of different tubs of the whiskey, each one containing a different animal: cobra, armadillo, geckos, tiger penis, scorpion.  Apparently they each bring their own quality to the drink.  2 of the 35 of us took a drink of the snake whiskey, and after seeing their faces, the remainder of us politely declined :)  It is weird that you can come to this little bit of Laos without going through customs or immigration.  You don't even require a passport!  There were a couple of official looking men in uniforms sitting at a half dead trestle table under a ripped makeshift tarp / cover, but they barely even glanced at us, so I wasn't sure of their purpose.  I suspect the issue resides more in getting out of Laos than trying to get into it.  It was dirty, poor and sad.  It appeared poorer than Thailand (it is), and more hopeless.  I was glad to leave, even though it meant negotiating this awfully strange and dangerous set of makeshift stairs / ladder thing that I ended up most ungraciously kind of half-crab walking down to get to the boat!  No, there are no photos of me doing that :)

Following Laos, we went to the northernmost part of Thailand to the border of Burma (Myanmar) and then headed back, stopping at a village on the way, where I saw six of the cutest little puppies I think I've ever seen, and their mother who was heartbreakingly emaciated from lack of food.  I fed her all the snacks I had and a couple of guys on the bus followed suit, which made me happy.  Poor thing was so hungry she scoffed down dried banana and rice cakes.  It really upset me (as do all the skinny dogs I see around here).  It's a sad and often overlooked aspect of poor countries... starving animals.  I spent a large portion of the return bus trip trying to concoct a plan to fix it, and to also send these village kids to school.  The only way I could manage it was to become richer than the pope, so this book needs to be GOOD (and more importantly, needs to be WRITTEN AT ALL).  The other reason I was so angry is that there were two male dogs there were looked perfectly healthy (presumably one was the father), and I wondered why that was?  If they simply had better hunting skills / instinct then fine, but if they were being fed and the female wasn't, or she wasn't being fed sufficiently to replace everything she was giving to her puppies... I mean, who knows?  It got me thinking furiously about cultures in the world where women are basically treated as sex slaves / punching bags, then incubators, then milk machines, and no one ever gives a crap about them as an individual with human thoughts and desires and SUPPOSEDLY, rights. *sigh*  It's pretty hard to escape those kind of thoughts here.  However I think this is a good thing.  It's all very well to jump on my soapbox at parties after sitting in my expensively refurbished lounge room looking at a glossy brochure of people suffering in third world countries, but seeing it in person provides a tangible and lasting effect.  If I ever had any doubt about my commitment to human rights causes (please understand in this context I am referring to poverty as I believe it is the No.1 social injustice on the planet) then those doubts are banished forever.  Click here to see the Golden Triangle pics, including the whiskeys!

A funny aside... Most of us slept for a while on the way back, as it was a four hour drive and it had been a very long day.  However, as sometimes happens when I sleep sitting up and my windpipe gets blocked, I woke myself up doing an absolutely gigantic snort, followed by a fit of hysterical and uncontrollable giggles.  My snort woke up three of the other people on the bus, who turned around in their seats, looked at me and then began giggling like mad as well, which made me even worse.  So the four of us giggled for several minutes together, which was great, because they didn't speak much or any English so we hadn't interacted all day.  Fortunately, laughter translates :)

NOW, if you have made it this far, congratulations!  Not long to go.  Sorry for the waffle, but I really have done a huge amount this week!  Yesterday's activity was my favourite...

YeePeng Sansai

This is the Buddhist festival where they release the floating lanterns.  Where the participants do, more accurately, including us (I and some lovely people I met here in Chiang Mai).  We caught a songthaew out to Mae Jo where it was being held.  There is a field with about ten thousand stands each with a candle on top.  You buy your lantern all folded up, have some (free!) food, then grab yourself a candle and sit down for the religious part of the festival.  Not being Buddhist or in fact religious in any way, I found that part pretty boring... probably only slightly less irritating than sitting through a full Catholic Mass, and it only possessed that slight advantage because I couldn't understand what they were saying.  However, once all the candles were lit we were able to fill our lanterns up and release them.  One of the most incredible things I've ever seen or experienced.  Really, I recommend anyone thinking of traveling to Thailand / Chiang Mai around this time of year at least attempt to co-ordinate the dates.  Again, photos don't do it justice, but you can see the ones I took by clicking here.   We lost track of ours almost immediately :)  I find it really interesting who you attract when you put things out into the universe.  The group of ladies I met predominantly know each other from the organisation in which they work here, which is a human rights organisation that deals particularly with women's issues, helping them use the law effectively and just generally promoting women's human rights in the Asia Pacific Region.  So it was amazingly fortuitous that I managed to encounter all these fabulous ladies!  Incredibly chuffed about the whole experience really.  One of them took a quick video of the fireworks that came on after the main release, you can still see some stragglers sending their lanterns up.  Click here to see the video.

Well that's all from me for this week!  A massively long one, I know.  I shall definitely do less touristy stuff and more writing this week.  Discipline, and all that.

Til next time,
*LOVE*
N

Saturday, 22 October 2011

Two Steps Forward...

Distance Traveled:   12,600 kms (BNE-MEL-SYD-BKK-PKT-BKK-CNX)
Flags Collected:   0
Time Difference: -3 hours (from Brisbane)
Soundtrack:   I have been getting into bad 80s stuff this week for some reason
Currently Inspired by:   Buddhist Monks.  Cool guys.  Did you know they can't eat anything that isn't served / offered to them by someone else? They are not allowed to pay attention to their bodily requirements by buying or preparing their own food.  I am yet to find one to feed, but am on the hunt!
Stacks:   Heaps of almosts. I nearly fell off my elephant, getting on. Slipped on the bamboo raft getting on AND off and got my shoes soaked and covered in mud (I may have to throw them out), and have tripped on uneven ground several times just walking around.  It's only a matter of time before I end up on my butt.
Words written:   1,532 (I know, I know, but it's hard!)

Well the floating markets outside of Bangkok were certainly an experience!  I loved them, despite the smelly canals, flooded homes along the way, flooded stalls, and tippy, low-sitting boats.  Totally different and surprisingly relaxing.  It's something I would recommend to any westerner traveling to Bangkok as a bit of an eye opener (and to get out of the city).  Try as hard as I might, I can't get my Western sensibilities around anyone actually CHOOSING to live along a canal.  It must contain some kind of appeal that was not immediately obvious.  To see all the photos in my Bangkok album including those of the floating markets, click here.  Unfortunately I was completely shopped out by this point, in terms of temper, finance and suitcase room, so I only bought one colourful Thai-style dress and some postcards :)  It doesn't take much for me to get over shopping really, given that I don't enjoy it... ever... Sometimes I feel like all there is to do in Thailand is buy crap at markets!!  Of course that's crazy.  There is a lot of stuff to do here, such as playing  "Dodge The Flooding", "Guess The Mystery Meat", "Say No Thank You To The Same Person As Many Different Ways As Possible", "Answer Intrusive Personal Questions", "Argue With Taxi Driver", and of course the ever entertaining and my personal favourite: "Conversations With Porcelain".

I hope you realise I am trying to be be funny.  I love it here, really.  Chiang Mai is definitely my favourite place so far, not in the least because it's the first place where I have felt that the people in the service industry haven't just been being surface polite and professional while actually being horribly resentful towards me (and all western travellers).  They are more genuinely cheerful and friendly.  I'm not being paranoid... my instincts are pretty good.  And I'm fairly certain that no matter how friendly I am or how much I tip everyone for so much as breathing in my general direction, I am no more to these people than a fat western "have" to their "have nots".

The elephant safari.  Wow.  Firstly let me say that anyone who tells you an elephant is a comfortable, expedient or in any way pleasant smelling mode of transportation is having you on.  But how unbelievably incredible they are.  Gentle.  And SMART!  I mean, I knew this already, but to actually see it up so close is one of the best experiences I have ever had.  It's ridiculous really.  For something like $75 AU (which is very dear for a tour here) you get picked up from your hotel, driven for about an hour to this indescribably beautiful training camp where you can feed them bananas and pat about 10 of the elephants for half an hour.  (Oh I forgot - first you stop off at an orchid farm and butterfly farm!)  Then you sit and watch the elephants file into the river with their mahouts and have a scrub and a bath.  For a short video of the bath, click here.  After that, you watch them do a show where they work in group to shift some logs around and pop them in really neat piles, then the mahouts drop their hats on the ground and the elephants pick them up and walk them over and put them back on their heads so gently!  Then one of them stands near an easel and they handed her paintbrushes one after the other, and she painted a tree with flowers and grass, as per the picture below.  I mean... WHAT?









For more pics of the elephants as well as the orchid and butterfly farms, click here.  You could buy an elephant painting for 600baht ($20) but I have way too much stuff and thought it would probably get wrecked anyway.  I have the picture of the pic!  SO, after the show, you then go up to this platform and climb onto your elephant.  As the group was uneven because I was on my own, I got my own elephant while everyone else had to share.  I was most grateful I didn't get squished up there with some stranger!  Also I was at the head of the column, so I got to blaze the trail, so to speak.  My elephant was the oldest and smartest, which made me feel like looking back at everyone and saying "Nyah, Nyah".  The first portion of the ride went for about an hour, along a ridge next to the river (it's incredible the tiny spaces in which they can manouevre!) and then down into the jungle, along a freshwater creek bed.  The canopy of trees above made the air look and smell incredibly green, and there were these tiny metallic dragonflies that glowed when they hit patches of sun, darting around like tiny blue fairies.  Honestly, it was like the enchanted garden or something.  Silent, but not oppressive at all.  I had to pinch myself several times, because my brain just kept looping "I'm riding an elephant through a jungle in Thailand" over and over.  We stopped then at a small village and chatted and bought some stuff from the locals before climbing back on and going back the way we came, which obviously took another hour. Click here to see a short video from the ride. Then (yes there was more to it!) we stopped for a delicious lunch of several traditional Thai dishes with rice, noodles and fresh fruit before jumping on a bamboo raft, and rafting gently down the river for about 45 minutes, seeing elephants along the banks all the way, before pulling up and getting back on our bus and coming back to the hotel.  For $75.  Isn't that ridiculous?  I was sooooo tired yesterday I couldn't write, so am going to make a herculean effort this afternoon after my massage.  I only have this kind of low desk and little piano stool so my knees are up around my ears and I get pins and needles in my feet from sitting too long.  I guess I am going to have to get used to writing in uncomfortable circumstances!!

I have been most fortunate in my timing as Bangkok was expected to get hit quite badly with floodwater today or tomorrow.  I have missed all of the flooding due to luck rather than skill, but the outcome is the same!  I was planning to spend a few days travelling south overland back to Bangkok but am not sure if this will be possible now.  Still investigating.

Til next we speak
*LOVE*
N

Saturday, 15 October 2011

Money Money Money


Distance Traveled:   11,000 kms (BNE-MEL-SYD-BKK-PKT)
Flags Collected:   0
Time Difference: -3 hours (from Brisbane)
Soundtrack:   Stormfront's Beatles Album
Currently Inspired by:   Nothing. I'm chilling.
Stacks:   Tripped up steps while reading a text message, stumbled on a street while gawking at clubs. No bruises, but plenty of bites and sunburn.
Words written:    Haven't started yet... I should remove this until I have because it makes me nervous
I realise that I said my second blog would be a week or so away from now, but I have done more than I expected and need to get it all down before I forget!  As always when I travel, I go through an initial period of timidity in each new country before my confidence can build again.  Thailand is no exception, and as a result I have nothing to add to my 500 Kisses album at this stage.  However, I do have a new album called Phuket / Patong which you can access by clicking here.  Oh, and there are more photos in the food album as well.  I chose not to put the deep fried witchety grubs, locusts and crickets in the food album, because I have not yet summoned the courage to eat them.  However, as promised, this is something I will do (and take pics of) before I leave the country.  See below.  Appetising, no? Eeep!


I'll get my gripes out of the way quickly.  I am looking forward to getting off the beaten track a little so I can have an interaction with a local that does not involve them trying to get money off me.  The incessant "wanna handbag madam", "brand new shoes madam" "taxi, madam" is driving me crazy, not in the least because I absolutely detest being called madam.  Another thing that bugs me is obsequious behaviour, such as bowing.  I always bow back if I can to try and reduce that feeling of guilt that arises whenever I'm faced with it, but ideally I would have them just not do it in the the first place!  I'm sure I had more gripes... oh yes.  My legs are covered in nasty little sandfly bites (my fault) and there are too many scruffy looking dogs about the place which make me sad.  NOW, onto the good stuff:

I freaking LOVE this place.  The crazy heat, the constant sound of waves, my huge hotel bed and nice room for $70 per night, the weird-arse Thai versions of western breakfast, cheap street meat, the higgeldy-piggeldy streets and architecture with slums next to McMansions and modern service stations next to weird slanty garages made of rusty corrugated iron, hysterically misspelled English signage, the cutest kids EVER, awesome food and fruit, drinking frozen mai tais out of pineapples, the tasty crispy seaweed things that I've become dangerously addicted to, those browned up older western guys with no shirt and too many gold chains on, the constant noise and colour and movement, the adrenaline rush you get just trying to cross the street, streets full of mismatched blinking neon signs at night... ahhhh.  

I have spent days doing nothing more than walking to the end of the main drag and back then getting sunburnt by the pool at the hotel (again, my fault) and sipping on cocktails.  This was the perfect place to come and recharge my batteries before getting stuck into the writing.  

Yesterday I went to some famous Phuket sites such as the Karong View Point (gorgeous), the Big Buddha (impressive), Chalong Temple (ridiculously ornate), the Cashewnut Factory (oh, I'm getting to that, don't worry) and the weekend markets, surely the largest markets in Thailand if not up there are one of the largest markets in the world.  I walked through them at a fairly decent clip where possible and couldn't even get through them in an hour and a half.  Incredible setup though, and well worth the trip.

Now, when someone refers to a place as a "factory", what springs to mind?  Rows of machines and workers busily doing repetitive tasks, churning out masses of whatever it is they are making.  Right?  Well, the cashewnut "factory" that we went to was basically a giant shop, full of tins and packets and jars of various different flavours of cashews, and also a selection of various dried fruits, meats, (next to the dried pork they had pictures of two little pink baby piggies, presumably in case you couldn't read the sign.  Does that make you hungry?  Mmmmm) and a variety of sweets.  Doesn't sound much like a factory, does it, until you get to this tiny corner, where a lone woman was sitting with a big bucket of cashews in their shells, picking one up, pressing a foot lever after a which a prongy thing at her hands came down and cracked the shell, then splitting the shell and prying out the nut with another prongy thing and popping it in an icecream bucket.  One woman, just doing this over and over.  Now, I couldn't help but ask myself - is this woman responsible for the shelling of South East Asia's entire cashewnut harvest?  Apparently it was the largest factory of its kind in the entire region... meaning any smaller factories would have to contain zero workers and therefore not be terribly productive.  It's a head scratcher!  I went into that place planning to buy nothing and left with a veritable treasure trove of flavoured cashews, orgasmically good toasted coconut things, cashewnut juice - carbonated and in a softdrink can (oh, yes) and other stuff that now I'm not really sure about.

For whatever reason I am not in love with the idea of Bangkok and big cities right this second, so after I land there on Wednesday I will stay in Wednesday night, explore the floating market on Thursday (no jokes about flooding, please), and then Friday I have booked a flight up to Chiang Mai, and an elephant safari.  This is something I have been dreaming about since I concocted the plan for this trip, so I am extremely excited.  I will stay in Chiang Mai for a week or so and then very slowly make my way overland back down south and stay in little towns where possible, then head back to Bangkok for a few days before beginning my Cambodian adventure.

In the meantime, I have three more days of luxuriating in a nice room with nice food and lots of English speaking people around me, and I intend to make the most of it.  So, until next we speak....

*LOVE*
N

p.s. Can anyone explain to me the significance of having cats at all sacred sites?  Are cats sacred here?  Am too lazy to look it up.  I am definitely enjoying getting to pet some kitties although it makes me miss my babies back home :( 
p.p.s. Send me your news!


Sunday, 9 October 2011

Launching 2012 Eat, Write, Eat (and Kiss) Tour 2012



Distance Traveled:   2600 kms (BNE-MEL-SYD)
Flags Collected:   0
Time Difference: +1 hours (from Brisbane)
Soundtrack:   Slash Self Titled, Them Crooked Vultures Self Titled, Smashing Pumpkins Mellon Collie
Currently Inspired by:   Henry David Thoreau.  Particularly "A truly good book teaches me better than to read it. I must soon lay it down, and commence living on its hint. What I began by reading, I must finish by acting."
Stacks:   A couple of trips in a shopping centre, followed by nearly knocking over the table at Red Lantern.  Nothing too serious, and no bruises yet!
Words written:    Zero of any significance 

'Tis the day before I leave for Thailand.  The tour kicked off with four days of fun and frivolity in Lady Melbourne with the always delectable Ms Amanda Roberts and terminally adorable Mr Tim Carolan, followed by two days of culinary feasting in Sydney with the strange and wonderful Mr Daniel Radman.  Next update will be from Thailand in a couple of weeks, providing I can get there and stay there, with the flooding that is going on!

Someone recently referred to what I was doing on this trip as an "early life crisis".  Initially I had some problems with that description - three to be precise - however when thinking about crisis in its original use as "a stage in a sequence of events at which the trend of all future events, especially for better or for worse, is determined; turning point", it actually seemed quite applicable.  And the 'early life' part?  I suppose I can live with that.  Magnanimous, no?

I feel there should be some pomp and ceremony for the official "launch" of this tour so, here goes:  I hereby declare the Eat, Write, Eat (and Kiss) Tour of 2012, officially open. *smashes bottle of champagne on something* 

I will be sending out group emails such as the one you probably just received, with links to these latest blogs and favourite photos.  The remainder of my photo albums will be posted on facebook for any of my fb friends to see.  If you don't have facebook, then too bad I'm afraid!  That's where they'll be.  If you do have facebook but are not my friend on it, then why are you reading this message right now?  Shoo! ;)  Seriously, add me if you haven't already.  I will have a different album for each city, but I will also have my side projects.  Anyone who knows me knows how obsessed I am with food.  I have started a food album on facebook and will be showcasing awesome dishes from all over the world!  Also, I am attempting to get photos of myself kissing or being kissed by 500 people in the year I'm away.  This album is rather prosaically titled "500 Kisses".

Those forward thinking individuals with Skype who shall from now on be referred to "my travel buddies", I shall be speaking with you soon either via video or via IM.  Again, if you have Skype but we are not each others' contacts on it, add me: natalieo78.  It is how I will be doing the lion's share of my communicating over the next 12 months.

Of course you can still email me at natalieo78@hotmail.com and use my current mobile 0406 125 830 which is really just for receiving texts.  It is unlikely I will ever answer it if it rings unless we have arranged something beforehand, and if I don't need to respond right away then I'll probably reply via email.  However, feel free to send important info, freak out messages about tsunamis, political demonstrations etc. If I end up buying sim cards in countries I am staying in for a while, I will advise of those numbers.  However I don't know how often I will be bothered with this.  

Don't be afraid to email me the excruciatingly boring details of every day life back home.  I love that stuff! Not joking.

Below is my itinerary. Come and visit me in:

11 Oct 11
Sydney - Bangkok - Phuket


19 Oct 11
Phuket - Bangkok

Random travel through Thailand

5 Nov 11
Bangkok - Phnom Penh

Tour and random travel through Cambodia


Approx 24 Nov 11
TRAIN Phnom Penh - Hanoi

Random travel through Vietnam

23 Dec 11
Hanoi - Bangkok - London


2 Jan 12
London - Marrakech



Random travel through Morocco


1 Mar 12
Marrakech - London


11 Apr 12
London - Munich - Budapest


Two weeks through Budapest, Prague, Croatia
Two months in Italy


29 Jun 12
Rome - Toronto - Portland

10 Jul 12
Portland - NYC


Approx 25 Sep 12 (Depending on money / visa / success of publishing!)
NYC - LA - Auckland - Sydney - Brisbane


*LOVE*
N